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I'm high on life. High on love. High on pain. High on feelings and emotions. High on questions and on answers. High on awe. As I said. I'm high on life.
The reality is that when we go down an uncomfortable rabbit hole of self doubt, anxiety, and fear of not being good enough, that's because we're living in complete disconnection to our soul. And just to be clear, when I refer to our souls, I simply mean the manifestation of the universe's wisdom and intelligence within us.
There's just no way
There's no way for us to feel small, doubtful and insecure, when we're living in full awareness of where we come from and the magic that's flowing through us every single minute of every day of every stage of our life.
Whether you have the job of your dreams or you feel stuck in a crappy job that you hate, that magic and wisdom is flowing through you, and it's your ability to notice it, to feel it, and to let it make all your life decisions for you, what's going to make the difference when it comes to you living in fear, anxiety and self-doubt, or you living in pure bliss, knowing and confidence.
Why I hated everyday
There was a time in my life where I just hated every day. The reality is that I thought that I hated my circumstances. But when I looked deeper and had a conversation with my soul in my journaling session, I realised that I didn't really hate my life. What I hated, was who I was being in my life. And when I looked even deeper, what I realised is that the reason why I hated who I was being, was because I was always trying to keep up with a person that wasn't really me. I was pretending, and it was exhausting. I was pretending to be what I thought others wanted me to be, in every area of my life. In my job and also in my relationships outside of work.
So no wonder why I was so exhausted. I felt like I had to keep up with this image that I was so freaking bored of. Because in trying to look like something that I wasn't, I pretty much became nothing. I was trying to make decisions with the polluted thoughts in my mind, and opposed to with the unique wisdom of my soul.
The biggest problem nowadays
The problem that we nowadays have in the world, is that we truly don't realise how magical each one of us already is. We keep finding magic all around us, whether that's in nature or in people that we admire, and we don't think that the magic that we see around us is already within us. Instead, we believe that in order to get and feel a little bit of that magic, we have to become something similar to what we see around us.
So we study and analyse what others are doing, and we try to replicate that. We look at our boss, colleagues, friends, random people on social media, and we try to reverse engineer what they're doing, to do it ourselves, and we end up feeling bored of ourselves, burnt out, disappointed and frustrated.
Not only we're using all of our valuable energy in the least magical way possible, but it also doesn't give us any results. So instead of noticing that what's wrong is this stiff method that we're repeating over and over again, we conclude that there's something wrong with ourselves. We believe that everyone else seems to have something that we don't. And we end up doubting ourselves every single minute of our days.
Nothing but fear is driving us
We feel scared to speak up, to share an opinion, to share an idea, to execute on an innovative plan, to do anything really. We've been slapped with disappointment so often, that all we hear is our mind telling us that there's something wrong with us. And that inner toxicity goes way out of control when we believe what those thoughts are telling us. That, is when we become truly hopeless, and fall into a dangerous cycle of depression and anxiety. We're depressed because we're not good enough, but anxious and lost in our mind trying to find a way to fix ourselves.
And you know why I can describe this so well? Because I know this cycle all too well. I've been there countless times, only to realise the most important thing that I've realised in my entire life: Your mind does not have the answers, because your mind is polluted.
Let me explain.
Your mind doesn't have the answers
Your mind is operating on a daily basis with thousands of thoughts. And the reality is, that most of these thoughts aren't yours. These thoughts are literally a compilation of what you're exposed to on a daily basis in your current life, plus what you've been exposed to from your childhood. Your mind carries beliefs and information that go way back to a time that you can't even remember because you were only a tiny little baby who was absorbing information from the environment.
And the reality is that in a world where most people are trapped in self-destructive patterns of fear and self-doubt, even if the people around you who love you just claim that they wan't to protect you, the energy that you're receiving most times, is an energy of fear.
From this energy of fear, we've learned since we were little kids, to look outside for answers. To educate ourselves. To get advice from others. To talk about everything that we feel and share all our ideas with the people around us, to get their approval. To look outside over and over again, and to accumulate as much information as we can, in order to make the right decisions.
Where creativity is born
But what we haven't realised, is that the best answers lie within ourselves, in silence and in stillness. And that's because in silence and in stillness, we can reconnect to the creative energy of the universe. It's only in this state, where great ideas that don't yet exist in the current world, arise. It's in this magical place within us, where true innovation is born.
But because we're not taught to look in there, we keep looking to find authenticity and come up with great ideas by looking outside. And what happens is that we end up creating mediocre copies of what already exists in the world. Because by following all the ''how to'' advice from people that already hacked some code for something, all we'll ever get to discover is things that already exist.
True power & authenticity
True power and authenticity lie in our connection to the creative force of the universe. When we can feel with every cell of our bodies and every bite of awareness in us, that the life and energy flowing through the most beautiful things in creation, including the people that we admire the most, is already available in us, then our entire world starts to shift. When we attune to that creative energy through stillness, we start standing out from the crowd without even trying.
When we attune to the powerful primal energy that we see in the people that we admire, as opposed to trying to replicate the things that they're doing, then our ego automatically gets out of the way and the universe starts working through us, and creates the most magical and beautiful things that you could ever imagine, through you.
It's not you who created
But it's not you creating those things. It's not you the little human. It's the universe through the little human that you are. And so, if you take anything from this piece of wisdom that's flowing through my little human right know, let that be, to stop trying to do what's already being done, in the hopes of finding joy and confidence.
The death of self-doubt and anxiety are inevitable responses to your willingness to reconnect to the wisdom of your soul, and to your ability to allow the creative force of the universe to work through you. Once you're attuned to this energy, there's no such thing as comparison or fear of being behind.
The death of self-doubt & comparison
Comparison doesn't exist because you can't compare life to life or energy to energy, and all you are is the same life and energy that you see around you. When you see someone succeed, you're succeeding as well, because the energy in the being who's succeeding is the same energy that lives within you. Therefore, there's nothing to compare, there's nothing to be intimidated by, and there's no being behind that makes sense.
All there is, is one life, one energy, one creative force. And that creative force is all that's flowing through you, every minute of every day of every stage of your life. That creative force is flowing through you right now. Can you feel it, thought? Are you attuned to it, thought? That, is the question.
Love,
Mary.
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