Updated: Nov 1, 2020
If you feel that in the past years, life has thrown at you challenge after challenge, battle after battle, stay here. I've got something for you. The challenges that you are facing, are of your own. This means, that no matter how much you try, that no matter how close that person is to you, you are the only one who really understands how hard everything has been. You are the only one who fully understands how difficult those battles were, and how much you got to grow when fighting them. This doesn't mean that the people around you don't understand at all. It doesn't mean that they don't care. It means that they also have battles of their own, which are not smaller nor greater than yours, and which blind them, in the same way that your battles may sometimes blind you of theirs. So when you feel unheard, unseen, and undervalued, hear them, see them, and value them. They have suffered as much as you have. Compassion, is the only thing that will get you closer to them. Compassion, is the only thing that will allow you to connect.
You're No Fool
Don't confuse being compassionate with being a fool. Compassion is for everyone, including yourself. Practice compassion toward them, but mostly toward yourself, so that you can little by little stop the need of projecting your pain over other people. Your battles are of your own. They are yours to fight, yours to enjoy, yours to celebrate. You may share them with the people you love, they may want to fight with you, enjoy with you, and celebrate with you. But always remember that that is their choice, and that while you are fully allowed to receive their gift with open arms, and find joy in their kindness, your battles are still of your own. Don't throw away the red flower that someone handed you, because you were expecting a blue one. No one is forced to give you any flower in the first place, and someone else will surely be happy to give you the blue flower that you so much want. Gifts are unrelated, don't throw away with anger a pot of gold because you wanted a pot of coal. Put it away elegantly, and keep fighting for your coal, if that's what you truly want.
If you feel that life keeps throwing you stuff, use them. Use the stuff. I know that you feel tired sometimes. That you feel that you need a rest. But let me tell you, it is way more tiring, frustrating and disappointing, to sit and wait for things to change, than it is to stand up and take action. You'll see that in the same way that life throws battles at you, it throws tools, and it throws signs on how to use them. You're already here, seeing it all, feeling it all. Go out, discover, use.
Realize that while some battles are very different from each other, other battles are quite similar, and you can use what you've learned in each one of them, when fighting the other ones. Even for very different battles, the tools that you have gained are surprisingly interchangeable. When you feel like you've fought the same battle a thousand times, realize how well you are able to fight now, compared to your first battle. Realize all the uncertainty that has been removed, due to all the practice you've had, and all the knowledge that you've gained.
Fight with Elegance
Make peace with the fact that life is battle after battle. Fight one battle at a time, and instead of complaining about fighting the same battle again, use what you've learned already. Fight with elegance, and understand that if you're fighting the same battle again, you can either master what you consider yourself to be decent at, or choose a new skill to learn.
There is no greater feeling than the sensation of being on holidays, in the middle of discomfort. Knowing that external circumstances are out of your hands, the best that you can do is to master inner peace in the middle of adversity. While this sounds like being trapped inside bad circumstances, it is completely the opposite. This skill is all about keeping your power to yourself, and allowing yourself to elegantly jump from battle to battle, with the trophy in your hands. This skill is the one that will keep you from drowning in the first battle, or even from spending to much time learning the same lesson, so that you can jump to the next game. Play. Just play. Play, loose, and play again until you win. Move on to the next level. Don't waste too much of your time crying over the battle that you just lost. Don't you see it? There are not limits. Just play again, or choose a different battle, it's that simple.